Things My Mother Taught Me

When I become famous and am asked to write my memoirs, I’ll have to include a chapter called “Things My Mother Taught Me.”

It’ll be a thick chapter.

She’s imparted a lot of lessons, using wisdom and example, humor and anecdotes – even some occasional sharp words and strict discipline when situations warranted it.

Like most mothers, she has employed the power of guilt, when I could sense her disappointment seeping deep into my soul. And she has been known to drop funny little notes or encouraging newspaper articles in lunch sacks, purses or on top of bed pillows. 

There’s a lot she’s passed on about the faith. One lesson I’d have to include would be the way she models trust in God, especially in tough times, and her ability afterward to see how the Lord had been at work bringing graces and blessings.

There was the time my dad lost his position at work and had to settle for a lower-paying one with less consistent hours, especially in the winter. At the time, his job loss seemed devastating for a large family. But my mother prayed and trusted.

And in retrospect, she saw how everything fell into place. Her youngest child had just started college, freeing her up to enter the work force. She’s a nurse, and nurses were in high demand at the time. She happened to see a newspaper ad offering free refresher training and jobs for nurses who had been away from their profession. She took up the offer to supplement her family’s income.

But more importantly, my dad’s time was freed up. He was able to care for his dying father, often spending the night with his parents and delaying the painful task of putting him in a nursing home. For my father, those hours with his dad and away from work were precious.

Looking back, my mother was able to see that what seemed like a bad thing was actually good – that God had provided. But she needed the eyes of faith to see.

I am forever grateful to her for sharing her gifts and lessons of faith. And I’ll pray that God will continue to bless her as she celebrates her birthday this week.

May she continue to grow in trust and wisdom.

Inspired by the Year of Faith, Susan Szalewski began writing weekly columns for us. Although that year is over, we liked them so well that we asked her to keep writing. Thankfully, she said yes. So watch for these on Thursdays and see the Year of Faith Blog here.

Ask

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”

Thursday’s Gospel reading from St. Matthew invites us to give our needs and desires to God, and Jesus promises that He will answer our prayers.

But are some of the things we ask for too petty? Is it okay to pray that your sports team will win, that you will find a parking place, that you will pass a test at school? Should we bother God with the minutiae of our lives, when there are weightier things (the salvation of souls, world peace, etc.) for which to ask?

I think those questions are answered in a reflection contained in the monthly devotional Magnificat: 

“God takes delight in answering His people’s prayers, whether in great matters such as Queen Esther’s plea for the life of her people or in small daily needs. All He asks in return is our trust.”

I think trust is crucial here. When I pray for my favorite sports teams, a parking space for an oversized van or the success of my children at school, God often gives me what I want. (Of course I try to keep “Thy will be done” in mind.) When God answers my little prayers, He builds my trust in Him, teaching me to lean on Him in matters big and small. So that when I ask our Lord to bring souls to Heaven, heal the sick, and reconcile all that divides us, I know that He listens and cares.

For Jesus teaches us:

“Which one of you would hand his son a stone when he asked for a loaf of bread, or a snake when he asked for a fish? If you then, who are wicked, know how to give good things to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good things to those who ask Him.”

Inspired by this Year of Faith we will be posting columns like this from Susan Szalewski about exploring and/or deepening our faith. Watch for it on Thursdays.

Trust

One definition of faith, or at least a component of it, is trust

Throughout the Bible, especially in the Psalms, we are urged to trust God, even in the direst circumstances. In exchange for our trust, God gives us His mercy. That mercy, in turn, helps us trust God more. In the Gospels, we see how Jesus rewards our faith with His miracles.

During the 20th Century, two people helped us learn more about the relationship between trust and mercy: St. Faustina, a Polish nun who received messages from Jesus about His Divine Mercy, and her spiritual director, Blessed Father Michael Sopocko.

"The decisive factor in obtaining God's mercy is trust," Sopocko wrote. "Trust is the expectation of someone's help."

Our faith depends on our perception of God, the college professor said. If we are adopted sons of God, we should have a childlike trust in our Father. A lack of trust prevents God from lavishing His mercy and blessings on us. "It is like a dark cloud impeding the action of the sun's rays, or a dam cutting off one's access to spring water."

"We must put our whole trust in God," Sopocko said.

"Trust in God should be strong and enduring, without doubts or hesitations. Such was the trust of Abraham, who was ready to offer up his son in sacrifice. And such was the trust of the martyrs. On the other hand, the Apostles, during the storm, were found wanting in this virtue, and Our Lord reproached them with the words: 'Why are you fearful, O you of little faith?'"

Our humility, knowing our own faults, will strengthen our trust and reliance on God. Our trust should be our homage to God's mercy, the priest said. He added that trust in our Lord brings us joy, miracles, inner peace and opens the way to all the virtues.

Jesus, in the message he revealed to St. Faustina, described His Sacred Heart as as an infinite fountain of mercy from which anyone, even the most hardened sinner, can draw. All we need is a vessel.

"The graces of My mercy are drawn by means of one vessel only and that is trust," He said. "The more a soul trusts, the more it will receive."

"But there is more to trust than just believing that God is trustworthy," according to the Marian Fathers of the Immaculate Conception, who preach about Divine Mercy.* "We have to act upon that belief. Trust involves a turning back to God, a real conversion of our whole lives to God, repenting of our sins and forgiving others. Trust is a living faith.

"Trust means that we agree to let God be God, instead of trying to be God ourselves. (Trust is the antidote to the first sin of Adam!) It means that we agree that God can write the script of our lives, instead of insisting on our own script. It means that we agree with the great pledge we make in the Our Father: 'Your will (not mine) be done on earth as it is in Heaven.' It means that even in our moments of agony we agree with the cry of Jesus in the Garden, 'Not my will, but Yours be done.' (Luke 22:42).

"God is Mercy Itself, and we are called to practice the ABCs of mercy (Ask for His Mercy, Be merciful to others, Completely trust in Jesus). As we do, our trust in Jesus is the vital ingredient. We don't simply ask for mercy, nor do we simply try to be good to other people. We ask with complete trust, and Our Lord fills us with grace so that we can be merciful as our Heavenly Father is merciful."

Again, Jesus speaks through St. Faustina: "I am Love and Mercy Itself. When a soul approaches Me with trust, I fill it with such an abundance of graces that it cannot contain them within itself, but radiates them to other souls."

*from the Web site "The Divine Mercy"

Inspired by this Year of Faith we will be posting columns like this about exploring and/or deepening our faith. Watch for it on Thursdays.